I love the internet.

While surfing the internet for this weekend’s church message, I came across a YouTube video of the church’s band singing the song “One Thing” by finger eleven. In the related videos section, I came across one of the greatest speeches in one of the greatest movies of all time. “One Thing”. Before reading on, take a peek at the video here.

Here’s the transcript:

Curly says, “You city folk, you worry about a lot of shit.”
Mitch replies, “Shit?! My wife basically told me she doesn’t want me around.”
Curly chuckles. “Is she a redhead?”
“I’m just saying—”
Curly interrupts. “How old are you…38?”
“39.”
“Yeah. You all come here at about the same age. With the same problems. Spend about 50 weeks a year getting knots in your rope, and then you think two weeks out here will untie them for you. None of you get it. Do you know what the secret of life is?”
“No, what?”
Curly smiles and holds up one finger: “This.”
“Your finger?”
Still holding up one finger, Curly says, “One thing. Just one thing. You stick to that and everything else don’t mean shit.”
Mitch holds up his own finger. “That’s great. But what’s the one thing?”
Curly says, “That’s what you’ve got to figure out…” And then he rides away.

Me and Bella are settling down for the night watching City Slickers, and with the emotions of I’ve encountered the past week, hell, the past year I really just wanted to sit and clear my concious about a few things.

It sounds crazy but one of the many things I’ve been thinking about is making my peace with the big man upstairs. There was a big part of me for the longest time that was very bitter for all that transpired in my life. Right or wrong I said some pretty stupid things. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve grown in many ways, and spiritually is one. All I can think about is my time waiting in line at the pearly gates, what I’m going to say. I’m a good guy and I have nothing to hide in my life, but trying to make peace. I suppose I’m still working on it. I’m 4/5ths of the way there, it’s just that last piece that is troubling.

Then I stumble upon this video. It got me thinking, what’s the one thing in my life that if I stick to it, everything else won’t mean shit. I spent all day thinking about this. If I’m honest, it’s not the first day I’ve wasted thinking about this. What’s important to me. What’s so big in my life that if I just stick to it, everything else would be non-existant.

I love Bella. I’ve only had her for a month now, but she’s changed my life moreso then I ever thought possible. Since I’ve had her, life has slowed down so much. I mean that in the most positive of ways. She’s got me on a schedule which I’ve been missing for …. well lets be honest, I’ve been missing a set schedule for my entire life. For the first time in my life, the past month(MONTH!) I’ve woken up at 7am and now I can do it without an alarm clock. We go for a run in the morning, a walk in the afternoon. This past weekend we went fly fishing and a really long hike. She’s so well behaved that everywhere we go we get complements. It was love at first sight. I knew from the moment I saw her that she was coming home with me. I love Bella. I love how her ears flop in the wind. I love how every morning she reminds me it’s a new day when she pauses and sits to feel the sunshine on her nose when I take her out to go potty. I love how many kisses I get when I get home after a long day of work. I love how her favorite seat in the house or wherever we are seems to be my lap. I love how she runs in her sleep and snores really loud, just like me. I love how sweet and gentle she is. I love how she demands my attention. I love how she lets me give her a ton of attention.I love how even when she poops in the house and she sits there with her little eyes and wags her tail I can’t help but not be mad at her. I love how she doesn’t speak a word of english and yet we communicate so well. I love how happy she always seems, even though I know she’s not had the life she deserved in the past. I love everything about her.

For the past year with everything that’s happened to me it’s felt like I’ve been buried under the weight of the world. I couldn’t even tell you what. On the outside, to a total stranger my life seems like a fairy tale. Inside though, a swell of emotions comes to the forefront. I don’t know what’s missing, but I feel like something is missing.

So my one thing …. it can’t just be Bella. What about family? What about friends? What about how a diet coke makes me feel? Or a full tank of gas? Or a stiff drink and a stogey. Or hanging out with friends …..

Again, I get to thinking about things that are missing in my life and it kind of just makes me feel bleh. To be fair to the positive side of my personality I thought of alot of things that make me happy, things that I love.

I love to go fishing. I love family and friends. I love the Buffalo Bills(pathetic I know). I love a hot shower in the morning. I love pulling hot socks and towels out of the dryer. I love the way a new shirt feels for the first time. I love watching movies. I love a stiff drink and a stogey.I love crawling into a bed with fresh sheets. I love programming. I love laughing. I love movies. I love offroading/camping/hiking/outdoors.

There is alot of things in life I love. Then it hit me.

Love is my one thing. With love, everything else won’t mean shit.

I know this post was random. I probably didn’t touch on as much as I would have liked to(which usually happens). There are probably incomplete thoughts throughout and I’m sure it was a boring read. As I’ve said before, these posts aren’t meant for you, but for me. My own personal therapy sessions.