If it’s love, then make it hurt …

What an amazing, theraputic, relaxing, recharghing soul search week I’ve had.

It seems odd because I’ve blogged this before, I’ve seen the next sentance being retyped over and over in my mind, and yet it’s never made it to this point. Point being, just because I haven’t blogged here, only means that I’ve been given so many quiet moments to just breathe, relax and take all that life has to offer and think about it.

So, Monday, I got home from work semi-early and went for my bike ride. The wind was pretty strong that day to say the least, and the fact that my bike was acting up wasn’t helping. I performed "open heart" surgery doing 20 miles an hour into a headwind. Ok ok, so it wasn’t open heart, but I was fixing the gear ratios and adjusting the gear cables which I probably should have stopped to do, but I was in my zone.

The Gut Check zone where you just put your head down and ride. Your exhuasted, your lungs are screaming, your legs are burning and your mind beaten. It’s also a good time because you get to swallow bugs, chase deer off the road, ride really fast through a puddle of water all the way to the decent to your vehicle. For me it usually happens in mile 20, but for some reason my Gut Check Zone didn’t come until mile 25. It was a great grueling ride and with each succesful ride, I gain more confidance in myself and my abilities. Not just on the bike, but off the bike as well.

That monday night I came home, had a beer and smoked a cigar and the next thing I remember is it was time for work again. I had apparently slept on our porch the entire night. I remember waking up halfway through the night, feeling a cool breeze past, shiver, and realised that I’d rather be outside the rest of the night. And so I did.

Tuesday was rather odd, I had court in the morning for my expired tags. Quick Recap: 3 month old expired tags will lead to a ticket. Regardless, I refused to pay my fine so I could speak to the judge. Unfortunatly the judge on this day was not in the best of moods. I went in, raised my right hand, swore in the air. So help me god … ect. Only for the judge to lower my fine from 84$ to 64$ and charge an additional 20$ court room fee. That day turned out well. After work me and a couple friends went to grab beers, and then head to the park that’s across from Union Station. I came home, went for another bike ride and like a lightbulb. I was done for the day.

Wensday, I went over to my buddy brendens house. (I feel dejavu seriously). First we met at hooters, they were having a bikini contest. I didnt go into that white trash event only because it was so full haha, brenden informed me that it was pretty ridiculous looking ladies and apparently one of the contestants brought her parents! doh!

We just talked for a bit on his newly redone patio. Everytime I go there it reminds me of home, which is why I think I’m so fond of it. Brenden is a good pal of mine, and his wife denise is the cats meow and like a seragate mother to me. Brenden informs me of gardening tips, the great life of maintaining a house, removing too big of tree stumps and how to properly plant items that you don’t ever want to eat(aka in the shade). Moreso we usually talk about work, life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. It’s always good talking to people, and it’s even better when they are more than double your age just because they have been there and done everything I could possibly imagine. Of course, it’s nice too becuase people are looking out for my best intrests.

We talked for a while, and when I got home I realised that all the dates I had gone on the previous week were all ladies ranging from 25-28 years old. All signifigantly older than me, and it also dawned on me tha all of my friends are 35-50 years old. Married and settled down. Heck, most of the people I know and call my friends could easily be my parents. I guess I’m an old soul. I feel I can’t really relate to many people my age, primarily becuase they are at the bars every night, or clubbing or what not constantly. Alot of people my age have no clue what they want to do in life, where they have been or where they want to go. It’s really weird.

So, also on wensday I saw an advertisement which made me drop my jaw to the floor. SoI decieded to look up my next pursuit of happiness which is to get a degree or certification in <a href=http://education.denverems.org/career.html target=_NEW>EMT Education</a>. I found all the things I need to do before I can apply for the classes so next semester I’ll be enrolling in a few classes, get them knocked out of the way and then hopefully attend the classes. The training is from 6-10pm, and it lasts a couple years, plus on job training ect … which is great for me. I’m not looking to change jobs or career fields, but it is something that I’ve always wanted to do in life, and at my last apartment complex I always talked with the EMT’s and they have weekend hours only too. We’ll see, I’m really excited though. I think it will be a good learning and growing experience for me among many other benifits. Besides, who all do you know can say they have a bachelors in software engineering and is also an EMT?

Once I finish up that, I really would like to go back and get my masters. I’ve go so much I want to learn it’s not even funny, and not just learn, but retain the knowledge that was presented to me and be able to use it constructively.

"Education is a progressive discovery of your own ignorance."
-Will Durant

I half debated a journalisim degree in highschool but after reading a few fellow journalisim major bloggers I’m somewhat glad I didn’t. My thinking is far to abstract, simplisity is key for me as is keeping words under a 3 syllable maximum rule. Apparently those rules do not hold true in the journalisim world.

Regardless, I’m really excited for the adventures that will be coming my way soon. I am really looking forward to the next six months of my life. So many big and exciting, yet spooky, changes will be occuring. I hope I can handle them all….

So back now to Thursday. Thursday night was great becuase we went to the rapids game. We tied, but it was a ton of fun and I’m always a fan of sitting next to the hecklers!
<blockquote>
WhoÂ’s your father?
WhoÂ’s your farrr-ther?
WhoÂ’s your father referee?
Never had one
Never was one
YouÂ’re a bastard referee
</blockquote>
The kiss cam is always fun during halftime as is the cheerleaders going on stage. Such talented ladies … *dreams*… hehe. Ok, so they are not talented and half of them were not even attractive, but they wear the prestigous title of cheerleader so I imagine that’s got to count for something. haha, ok moving along. It was a ton of fun, and I now have a good place to sit that’s cheap and decent seats which makes going to the home games that much more enticing. Besides, the beer is so expensive that it keeps me semi-sober.

Lets see … and last night. Last night we went to dave and busters. Me and a bunch of old colleagues from IBM. We try to get together once every couple of months just to hang out and remenace about the good ole days of working our slave jobs, drink a few beers and play tons of addictive games. yes, addictive games. Like those stupid money wasting machines where you try to make the coins fall over the edge. Wow. Such a waste … but so damn fun! My favorite games at D&B have to be skee-ball, the rollerball derby in the back along with the basket ball games. Ton of fun. Of course, I can’t leave out beach head(both editions). By both editions I mean the silly cockpit you crawl into, and also the even sillier device you get in that swivels and moves all over the place. Not only do you look like a fool, but you get to soak in all the sweat of the previous fools forehead. hehe … but it’s always a ton of fun, and it’s always in awesome company. I got home about 3 last night and decieded to drink a beer and smoke a stogy out on the patio. Luckily I didn’t fall asleep out there but in my own, comfy bed.

Today, there is alot going on. I’m going to go for my bike ride here in a bit which should last a good 2 hours. Afterwards I need to head to fort collins. Adam came back to town to help amber move to chicago so it’ll probably be the last time I see them for a while. I’d really like to visit more often, but we’ll see. perhaps when the rockies play the cubs/white sox, or when the rapids play the fire. Or just out of the blue … but it will give me a good reason to get away and I’d have a place to stay in the windy city.

At 9 tonight Brandi is having a birthday bash. And, she’s doing a great job with her picture of the day. So am I, although I haven’t posted them in a bit, but I’m still doing it I promise! Anywho, she’s got a great gig going with her <a href=http://bshigley.livejournal.com/ target=_NEW>collages</a>. Very fun and creative.

Tonight is her b-day bash. Free beer, good fun and becuase she’s a superstar I hear it’s going to be big. Really big. As in, warehouse downtown, dj’s … the whole kit and kaboodle.

Very cool indeed.

Tommorow, is the rapids games and then a bbq full of ribs at brendens house. I’m in charge of bringing corn. Hopefully I don’t screw that up! Oh! Of course, a quick(or long) call to mom to let her know that I appreciate EVERYTHING she’s done for me. To thank her for staying with me every night in the hospital, for giving me an extra hundred bucks when I moved to Denver and for always being the greatest female in my life.

If I don’t post tommorow.

I love you mom.

If it’s love … then make it hurt.
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