"I just want to touch you girl, I want to feel you close to me, without your love I would give up now and walk away so easily … so maybe while were young we’ll figure out together, that even with the pain, there’s a remedy and we’ll be alright. I don’t want to live to see the day we say GoodBye."~Hootie & the Blowfish
As I’m sitting here, this song pops up randomly on my pretty extensive music collection. How odd that this song would come on, I thought I deleted it, many times. I suppose it didn’t, I suppose it’s there to serve as my life’s reminder.
I just have to sit back and smurk. I realise now that I’m lonley. It’s times like these when I wish I could share my insight, my ideas, my thoughts, my dreams, my world with another. It’s times like these when I just kind of sulk in my chair and face life. I’m alone. I’ve been single for just enough time now to hate going to the mall again, or to the movie complex. That’s where all the highschool/college kids go and it’s packed with couples. Happy ones, or at least fake ones.
I look around sometimes and it’s as if the world is spinning and I’m just standing still. Some guys, orgres – big hurly junky dorky idiotic goofy jockish guys, going out with gorgeous ladies. Probably as smart as my fish and about as intresting as a rock, but none the less. Then I see it opposite with girls to guys and it’s pretty intresting and it makes me kind of giggle.
It’s times like these when I’m most depressed. However, it’s times like these that I’m most happiest. I could have 2 kids and be married by now. Besides I don’t have the time or devotion for a signifigant other. She’d probably be pushed aside once the excitment settled down and then I’d probably want to be single again. Futher more I have so many goals and so many dreams that I need to challenge myself and achieve before I dare challenge anybody else.
-sighs-
Oh well. In time I suppose.
-sighs again-
So what is new? I started my new shift. Hopefully my new lifestyle. 8 hours of sleep is my goal. Which is why I need to be in bed at Midnight on nights that I go to school, and at 11:00 the days I go to work. I have to be up at 9:00am everyday for work and for school I have to go to school at 8:00am in the morning. No more sleeping in … bummer dude.
Oh well. school starts this wensday. I’m excited.
Wait, no I’m not. See I was excited becuase there will be alot of new ladies at the college, there always are during August, however with more ladies come more cars. With more cars means these ladies will have to park farther and farther out, closer to Betsie and I. I can live without that. I think I would exchange it all if that didn’t happen. I suppose it’s time to get going to bed now ..
take care all,
kc
Post a Reply