not good…

lets see.. it’s five thirty, work starts in a half hour. Meaning that I had better get ready for a long night. Well, let me just tell you something, these past 3 nights, combined I probabley have only gotten about 12 hours of sleep. Wether it becuase I’m thinking/wishing/dreaming/analyzing(sp?) something, I’ve not been sleeping well. Anyways, waking up at five oclock every other morning doesn’t help either. And also, the fact that on my actual day that I DO get to sleep in I can’t!!! they are doing construction on our apartments. GRRRRR!!!! at nine or ten oclock every day, you hear "POUND, POUND POUND" on your walls. So yea, kc = no sleep. well, also kc = stupid. Hehe. I am seriously! I decided, well, I’ll take an hours worth of a nap before I go… and now, oh man, I am yawning every five seconds and I can barley walk,
-NOTE TO SELF- I’m so tired, how am I even typing?
anyways, this whole situation reminds me that of a song written by the barenaked ladies, "sleep, and your never going to get it" or something like that.

anyways, yea, i’m tired, and the fact that my mind never stops doesn’t help anything either. For instance, today we had to imagine at every point in our life that we beileved was totall out of place. For instance, growing up, you said you would never drink, and one night you did, and you havn’t since, that one night you drank was totally out of place. for me, I had to think really hard on what I have done, and I suppose I’m the momma’s boy. I went with the approach that ever wanting to be somebody else would be a completly totally out of place for me. Just for the simple fact that I told myself growing up and firmly beileved that we are who we are, we all have our own identies and traits that make us unique. For instance, a guy I know, he is unique, he thinks he’s a cocky bastard, well, I suppose all the ladies like him so he must be either
a.) cocky
b.) attractive
c.) rich

well, Im not any of these, well, maybe a little tiny TINY bit of a. anyways, I’m diffrent them him becuase I use my personality to gain respect. Anywyas, one time in my life, about in febuary of 2002 I wanted to be like somebody else. So I wrote about it. I wrote alot about it, probabley more than anybody else wrote about their own things. anyways, that really got me thinking that I NEVER want to do that again, becuase although I wanted to be like somebody else then…. I got what was coming to me now, if not greater than he. which was my whole reasoning behind wanting to be like somebody else.
I guess the moral of the story, don’t try to be somebody your not, becuase if you stick to your guns, no matter the situation, those that wait, shall recieve.

Well, now that I have totally made NO sense whatsoever and confused the heck out of everybody, why don’t I just leave now? Good idea kc!
bye for now my totally confused fanclub!
kc