You are probabley wondering why I havnt written in my journal this past week. Well, I must admit, I have been trying not to write in it as often. Maybe once or twice a week. I need start weening myself off of things and people that remind me of my normal life. Such as not spending as much time with certain people, parents, friends ect.. stop getting on the computer so much. Stop watching to many movies. I need to ween myself off of these things and get ready for a change in lifestyles. I need and want to forget alot of things about this life up until now.. and when I move to denver and start over, I’d like to make things better for myself. I will some how..

Anyways… I just got back from my raquet ball class. I am enjoying it so much. It has brought me into new things. Me and a bunch of friends either play raquet ball or work out in the gym. I’m not allowed to work out becuase I’m underage, but as long as I don’t make a scene nobody cares…

I had better go.. I need to shower and then finish watching the rest of my hockey game. I need to finish watching the red wings whip up on some amateurs from carolina :p

kc

Adrienne
I’ve been thinking about you, my love
And all the crazy things that you put me through
Now I’m coming around, throwing it back to you
Were you think of me, when you kissed him
Could you taste me when you licked his skin
And all that while I showered you with trust and promises
What I’m needing now is some sweet revenge
To get back all that I lost then
I gave you all I had to give, but I could never reach you Chorus:
Adrienne, I thought I knew you
Once again, you used me, used me
Adrienne, I should have left you
Long before you used me, used me up Spent my money, drove my car
I treated you like a shining star
But in my sky all burnt out you are
And I’ll have the last laugh, when I see you walking with some other guy
‘Cause I know you are gonna end up all alone
So take these words, some good advice
All you’ve done’s gonna come back twice
You never cared how much it hurt, I really need to tell you Chorus What I’m needing now is some sweet revenge
To get back all that I lost then
I gave you all that I had to give, but I could never reach you Chorus

Sorry.. but I cannot get this song out of my head! It is a really excellent song by the calling called Adrienne. Its about a relationship turned bad, and now he realises what a fool he was. How bad he mistreated him and although he loved her, he ends up seeing the truth. I think I, and alot of people, are so compelled to this song is becuase everybody has been in one of these situations. this is a great song, havnt heard it? That is your loss anyways.. today I got a huge speech about how although I am graduated from highschool, and how when I move in 2 months I wont have to check in with my mother every five seconds.. but until I do move and am still living under her house I need to check in with her, tell her my exact movements and locations.. this was all brought on by betsie of course. I washed and waxed my car all day. left her in the garage all day too. mom pulls up, says I need to move my piece of crap vehicle. so im ticked… I go for a harmless drive around the neighborhood. I get back and she is spazzing out. Says that I need to check in with her, bleh bleh bleh. I suppose she doesnt understand, 2 more months, and I will never have to report in… she needs to get used of that idea. oh well, two more months. I figure that some of my relationships will "just be friends". Saddens me, but Im hoping I am wrong. If this is the case, id like to be a billon percent sure before I moved. I hate to see someone special waiting for me in a diffrent part of the USA. know what I mean? Anyways.. I had better get going.. its about 2 in the morning…

I wonder, how’s it going to be
When it goes down
How’s it going to be
When you’re not around
How’s it going to be
When you found out there was nothing
Between you and me
Cause I don’t care
How’s it going to be
And how’s it going to be
When you don’t know me anymore
And how’s it going to be
Who’s got their claws
in you my friend
Into your heart I’ll beat again
Sweet like candy to my soul
Sweet you rock
and sweet you roll
Lost for you I’m so lost for you
You come crash into me
And I come into you,
I come into you
In a boys dream
In a boys dream

Touch your lips just so I know
In your eyes, love, it glows so
I’m bare-boned and crazy for you
When you come crash
into me, baby
And I come into you
i will buy you a garden
where your flowers can bloom
i will buy you a new car
perfect shiny and new
i will buy you that big house
way up in the west hills
i will buy you a new life

yes i will

i know all about that other guy
the handsome man with athletic thighs
i know about the times before
with that obsessive little rich boy

they might make you think you’re happy
yeah maybe for a minute or two
they can’t make you laugh
no they can’t make you feel
the way that i do
If you could step into my head, tell Me would you still know me If you woke up in my bed, tell me Then would you hold me Or would you simply let it lie, Leaving me to wonder why I canÂ’t get you out of this head I call mine And I will say Oh no I canÂ’t let you go, My little girl Because youÂ’re holding up my World, so I need you Your imitation of my walk and the Perfect way you talk ItÂ’s just a couple of the million Things that I love about you So I need you So I need you So I need you So I need you And if I jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge, tell me would you Still follow me And if I made you mad today, tell Me would you love me Tomorrow? Please Or would you say that you donÂ’t Care, and then leave me Standing here Like the fool who is drowning in Despair and screaminÂ’ Oh no I canÂ’t let you go, My little girl Because youÂ’re holding up my World, so I need you Your imitation of my walk and the Perfect way you talk ItÂ’s just a couple of the million Things that I love about you So I need you So I need you So I need you So I need you IÂ’m on my own IÂ’m on my own IÂ’m on my own Oh no I canÂ’t let you go, my little girl Because youÂ’re holding up my World, so I need you Your imitation of my walk and the perfect way you talk ItÂ’s just a couple of the million Things that I love about you So I need you So I need you So I need you So I need you

Ok.. im done.. for now.. its midnight.. waaaaaaay past my bedtime.. until tommorow…

Yes, to any members of the band called the verve pipe. I must say.. it has been far to long since your last record. I loved everysong on it. I wish you would produce some more great songs, Your music, along with many other great artists get me through so many times. Good and the bad alike. It mostly helps me get through the bad, and makes my good times that much better.. but anyways. Today I did some soul/music searching. I put in some of my older cds. Everclear, lifehouse, dave matthews band, third eye blind. Man, so many great bands, not enough fingers and toes to count. I was listening to a select few songs…
Hows it going to be ~ Third eye blind
I will buy you a new life ~ Everclear
Everything to everyone ~ Everclear
Crash ~ Dave matthews band

Man, each has made me think today. Just listen to the lyrics. Im all about the lyrics a good song just isnt a good song without meaningful lyrics. Anyways.. hows it going to be reflects when two peole leave, I will buy you a new life is a song that reflects what he wants to be to that special someone, crash, that just reflects the similarities between two people..I thought so anyways… and everything to everyone is how somebody thinks what other people think about themselves, good or bad. Usually bad.. but all of which has given me some insight to diffrent situations. I know.. I am not making any sense. Which is ok.. becuase this journal is for me. And Im happy to say that his journal helps relieve alot ofmy thoughts and expressions that would probabley not have surfaced

Well, today I washed my car, AGAIN, those stupid birds… Other than a few, VERY FEW, select people in clovis, I cannot wait to move to denver.HOpefully all of these birds that take craps on my car will follow me up there, in the dead of winter and freeze to death. I am so upset with them.. Argh! Anyways.. I washed and waxed betsie. I need another coat on her tommoorw.. so I will do the same tommorow as well. I went to work today, watched a few movies. Joe dirt, not only was that a feel good movie, it was very funny. It just goes to show that although you may feel like a complete and utter loser, there is always somebody far worse off than you. No matter how bad you may feel, or how alone you feel, you just got to keep on ticking… one way or another..
Take Care,
~kc~

Ok.. i am going to make this as complicated as possible. Why you ask, becuase I am a simple guy that does not have enough sleep right now My speech is slurred and my typing, well, it just sucks right now.

1 house = 2,000 sq feet
1 neighborhood (30 houses) = 60,000 sq feet
1 Betsie = 66 sq feet
1 bird crap = .000000001 sq feet

Ok.. so… in my neighborhood there is approximatly 60,000 sq feet for a bird to do its business right? Well, the odds that you randomly place a .000000001 sq feet bird crap in a 60,000 sq foot area.. the odds that it gets withing a 66 ft range proximaty(sp?) is pretty stinking rare. Hell, its darn near impossible. BUT for somereason somebody is mocking me… not one, not two, not three, not four, and not even five but six, COUNT THEM SIX FRIGGIN BIRD CRAPS ON MY CAR this morning.

moral of the story

the odds of getting a .000000001 sq feet bird crap in a 60,000 sq foot area is pretty stinking rare. But throw in betsie, a good washing and one day and the odds are that you will have 6 out of 6 bird craps on the hood of your car. The day after you wash it. That is either
A.) pretty dang randomly lucky
or
B.)somebodys way of laughing at me. If I had my choice… Id pick b.. but anyways…

Other than bird crap on my washed car, things have been swell. I went to work today. Relaxed, mowed the yard, washed my car, ran some errands… watched a few movies and now.. now its 10:30 and I cannot hold my eyelids open anymore.. my raquet ball class made me so tired. Or was it work? Who knows.. all I know.. I gotta get some shuteye. Sorry for the short entry…
Take Care
~kc~

ps..
There is a song by hootie and the blowfish called hannah jane these are just a tad of the lyrics.. that is themp3 of the day, either that or crash by david mathews band… grrr.. its late, I cannot spell

You donÂ’t wanna be alone You donÂ’t want to see the sun go down You donÂ’t wanna open the door and see her go One step and tomorrow comes Two steps and sheÂ’s off with someone Three steps and itÂ’s all you know YouÂ’ll be gone, sheÂ’ll be gone